When the idle poor
Become the idle rich
You'll never know
just who is who
or who is which.
Won't it be rich
When everyone's poor relative
Becomes a 'Rockefellative',
And palms no longer itch
What a switch!
When we all wear ermine
And plastic teeth
How will we determine
Who's who underneath.
And when all your neighbours
Are upper class
You won't know your 'Joneses'
from your 'Ass-tors'.
Let's toast the day
The day we drink that drinky up
But with a little pinkie up.
The day on which
The idle poor
Become the idle rich.
When a rich man doesn't want to work
He's a bon vivant.
Yes, he's a bon vivant.
But when a poor man doesn't want to work,
He's a loafer, he's a lounger
He's a lazy good for nothing
He's a jerk!
When a rich man loses on a horse
Isn't he a sport, oh isn't he a sport?
When a poor man looses on a horse
He's a gambler, he's a spender
He's a low life, he's a reason for divorce!
When a rich man chases after dames
He's a man about town,
A man about town.
But when a poor man chases after dames
He's a bounder, he's a rounder
He's a rotter, and a lot of dirty names!
When the idle poor
Become the idle rich
You'll never know
just who is who
Or which is which.
No one will see
The Irish or the Slav in you
'Cause when you're on Park Avenue
Cornelius and Mike
Look alike.
When poor tweedle Dum
Is rich tweedle Dee
This discrimination will no longer be.
When we're in the dough
And off of the nut
You won't know your banker
from your but...ler.
Let's make the switch.
With just a few annuities
We'll hide these incongruities
With clothes from Abercrombie-Fitch.
Wheeeeeeeeeen the idle poor
Wheeeeeeen become the
Wheeeeeeeen idle rich
When the idle poor
Become the idle rich!